Just thought I’d clock in on my last day of the fast (day 60) and report I broke the 200 barrier and finished at 199 lbs. That was my mental goal, and it appears my body has cooperated. Tomorrow I start my transition back into eating solid foods, and thus begins my anxiety around keeping good eating and exercise habits going into the future. I expect to gain an instant 5-10 lbs from refilling my digestive track, which will put me around 210, but from there I hope to work down to a target weight of 175 lbs the old-fashioned way of exercise and caloric restriction. realistically, if I can get to 185 lbs, but I have decent musculature, I’ll be totally stoked. Some folks are astounded by my ability to fast for 60 days and say I have tons of willpower, but frankly fasting is way easier than just watching what I eat. My issue is that I love food a whole lot, and I love a lot of food more. I love the stuff that’s really bad for you too, like beef ribs and fatty cuts of meat. I also love coffee, and lots of it. All of these things have to be severely curtailed in my new life. Of course, having fasted willingly for 60 days, one would think that this should all be a breeze for me, right?
Except, I’ve done this fast several times before, and every single time, while it keeps for a while, I get lazy and I stop caring, and I put the weight back on. What I need is a permanent change in my attitude about my body image, and my health. What’s different this time around, is that I got a warning from the Doc about my liver, and the weight loss was for more than aesthetic purposes – that means keeping it off is for the same reasons. I’ve never really enjoyed working out or doing exercise, but I have to form new habits and new attitudes. Time to join the Gym, join weight watchers, and get on the life-long program that will keep me in shape and healthy into my later years. I’m in my mid-thirties, and this is when things traditionally start to shift in health from easy to hard, and it just gets harder as you get older, so this is the time to establish all those good habits. I’ve got the will, but I’m not certain if I have the willpower.
Anyhow, I’m on the eve of my return to the eating, and I’m just feeling anxious. I’ll keep you posted on how it goes in the weeks and months to come.